How the fuck do you download songs on this stupid fucking new Myspace player?

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Wanna know how to download music from it? Keep reading.

I'm pretty sure it was designed to destroy all hope that society is progressing or that I can continue to run a blog based entirely around “top friends.”

If you haven't trolled the Myspace music pages lately, then you haven't experienced pure rage.

More important than my inability to deal with the sleek graphic shading, the confusing buttons, and the inaccessible, if not nonexistent “download” option, is the fact that this exciting new upgrade was made possible because the major labels now have equity in Myspace.

Do you understand what this means? It means that every time you visit any little tape-munching bedroom jack-off's music page you are putting money in the coffers of Sony BMG, EMI, Universal and Warner.

For a more involved reflection on what this means for independent labels (who will be kept out of any chance of owning, as the majors do, part of Myspace), refer to what the guy who started Impose said for his new day job.

In the meantime, reflect on how much you hate yourself for letting this all happen. Because yes, it is your fault, you 18-34 year educated urban-dwelling etc. with your Myspace account started in 2004 and your tens of thousands of click-throughs that generated ad money for Myspace, which became News Corp., which became News Corp. teamed with the labels that brought you, as of late, Miley Cyrus and Goo Goo Dolls, Vol. 2. That's right, buy it at Circuit City.

Sure, we could call defiantly for the indies to band together, to form their own ad-free social networking society that rips the concepts that made Myspace successful without the cynical corporate cronyism that made it evil.

But why bother? That'll get bought up too. If you are a fast-food chain or a apparel company, email us.

That is, unless you can tell me how to download a goddamn song on this motherfucking new Myspace music player. Then maybe we can talk.