10 reasons you might get punched on National Punch a Hipster Day

Impose Automaton

Today is the first annual National Punch a Hipster Day. And while a few of us here at Impose have been accused of being hipster-esque, none of us are above punching another human being. It's just a fun thing to do. But how do you know if you're susceptible to getting punched? To help you out, we've tabulated 10 reasons you might get punched today. Obviously this is not foolproof and we take no responsibility if you still get punched (it's not our fault you had to rock the neon green WASP v-neck today), but if you're looking to avoid confrontation, here are some helpful hints to remind you why you may be a target.

10. You call goth music “dark wave”.

09. You're “done” with the word “hipster”.

08. You think cassettes have great sonic qualities. Don't even get started on VHS.

07. You unironically love to suck at the corporate teet.

06. You wear makeup and shave your armpits. Your girlfriend does not.

05. You live in New York and don't go to work.

04. You're already done with planking and onto stanking. (Don't ask.)

03. You do naked yoga and streak in the park.

02. You just replaced Kanye West on your iPod with Odd Future.

And the number one reason you might get punched today…

01. You're just copying my style anyway.


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