When we were pondering why in the hell Spin would devote an entire section of their web site to displaying and trumpeting the records they found to be the worst current releases, we naturally considered this here column. We thought, “Well, we do the same thing, kind of, except it's not the worst stuff, it's just the confusing lack of effort stuff that confounds our efforts to seek quality. Are we as evil?”
No, because if we were looking for the worst stuff in the world, the new Linkin Park record would be on here. That's how you can tell the difference! And what we are really trying to examine here, with this list, is hype. For example, look at number two on our list, the lovely Fiona Apple, releasing her closely-held and gestated fetus of an album on to the world with all of her trademark quirkiness and adorable reclusivity. Except – how can you be a recluse when every reporter gets to come and spend a day with you for their own, individualized tell-all about how much you hate everyone? So what we are trying to do here, how this idea is different from Spin, is that we aren't in it to be haters for fun, but to guide you through the very calculated caverns of high-gloss media junk, making you aware of what exactly you need to avoid.
The most average releases of June 2012:
Beach Boys, That's Why God Made Radio (Capitol)
Fiona Apple, Idler Wheel is Wiser… (Epic)
Flaming Lips, Flaming Lips and Heady Fwends (Warner Brothers)
The cover of Spin with Wavves and Best Coast trying to be Dave Navarro and Stevie Nicks (??????? x-P)
A Place To Bury Strangers, Worship (Dead Oceans)
Beachwood Sparks, The Tarnished Gold (Sub Pop)
Miami Heat: Basketball meets, dates, and makes sweet sweet love to capitalism.
Usher, Looking 4 Myself (RCA)
Waka Flocka Flame, Triple F Life: Friends, Fans and Family (Warner Bros)
Health Care Bill: The Supreme Court has been watching What About Bob and taking baby steps towards logic and compassion.
Japandroids, Celebration Rock (Polyvinyl)
Odd Future's “Sam Is Dead” video (Grabbing for traffic)
Ladyhawke, Anxiety (Modular Records)
Guided by Voices, Class Clown Spots a UFO (Guided by Voices)
Kitty Pryde, haha i'm sorry EP (WHEN WILL THIS BE OVER PLEASE)