I have to give the Jets credit, they are one entertaining bunch. From sexual harassment in the locker room to Brett Favre's dirty texts to Rex Ryan's foot fetish, it seems like there's never a soft penis in Jets land. And now we can add statutory to the list of offenses.
According to Deadspin, Mark Sanchez “hooked up” with 17-year old Eliza Kruger, the daughter of a couple of rich folks from Connecticut who apparently had a steamy divorce riddled with affairs. Shocking! But wait, there's more. According to the story, Eliza was out partying with her mom, divorcée Marie McCormick Kruger, when she allegedly met Sanchez at a Manhattan nightclub. “He thought she was 18,” a source told the New York Post. “She looks a lot older when she's all dressed up for a night out.” Funny, that's what Lawrence Taylor said.
Deadspin called it “somewhat romantic.” After all, Mark would text her from time to time. “He would send me a text at 2 a.m. on
a Wednesday asking if I was out that night,” Eliza said, “but I'd be
like, I have school tomorrow.”
That's high school for those of you not paying attention.
To be fair, the age of consent in New Jersey is 16 (Eliza “checked”), and no one's certain what “hooked up” officially means, but let's give it up to Mr. Sanchez for allowing us this moment to gloat. I mean, we all can't be Mexican Adonises, so we will revel in his shortcomings. Even if his shortcomings are hooking up with a hot 17-year-old.