I've got the answer for the Dodgers' woes

Derek Evers

Jackie Robinson slides into home

That's Jackie Robinson mother fucker!

Forget Mark Cuban, no matter what he brings to the table financially, he can't hold a candle to the amount of money my idea will bring MLB and the Dodgers. Los Angeles has had their fun with our team for 50+ years, but it's time the Bums came home.

That's right, I'm suggesting the Dodgers move back to Brooklyn. It sounds like a logistical nightmare, but teams are moved without thought these days. There's a hockey team in Phoenix, but we can't bring professional baseball back to Brooklyn? I don't believe it. Furthermore, I'm going to suggest how it gets done.

The main reason MLB wouldn't want this to happen is two-fold; they want two teams in Los Angeles and they don't need a third team in New York. This is understandable, so let's make it all so much easier and forget moving the whole team and organization to Brooklyn and consider what a simple name trade could offer. Because of Frank McCourt's mismanagement of the team leaving them in financial ruin, there's no reason Major League Baseball can't come in and strongarm some change. Meanwhile, across the country, the New York Mets are in a bit of a quandary themselves, and though it looks like they might have found some stabilization via a minority partner, they too could use a much needed PR boost. Thus, I'm proposing a simple name trade: Los Angeles becomes the Metropolitans (it still works), and the Dodgers come home to New York.

Granted, this idea was much better before the Mets built a brand new stadium in Queens, but I don't see many Giants or Jets fans complaining about their teams playing in New Jersey. I think Brooklyn baseball fans could deal with their team living 15 minutes outside of the borough. I'm sure many of you think this is a joke, but consider the windfall of cash revenue that would be sparked by Brooklyn Dodgers gear. The Brooklyn 'B' is still a consistent seller despite leaving in 1958 under cover of darkness. I will guarantee it becomes the number one selling logo and jersey in all of sports. Not just baseball. Every major US sport. But you don't have to take my word for it, because part of the deal would be a revenue share between Los Angeles and New York for the next ten years. This would help ease the transition for Los Angeles baseball fans and any loss in revenue they would attribute to “losing” the Dodgers. In most cases teams with new jerseys cash-in because fans have to buy all new attire, so one could expect the Los Angeles Mets to also be a profitable venture for the organization. Just in case they're still worried, the revenue split wouldn't be limited to merchandise, but also ticketing. The Dodgers and Mets have both been underachieving and underattended for the better part of the last five years, and intermittently throughout the last 20. The Brooklyn Dodgers would sell out for at least the next five, and consistently for the next decade. Wouldn't one extremely strong fanbase be better than having two middling fanbases?

Commissioner Bud Selig, if you're listening, you've already threatened to take over the team once, why not make this happen? Not only will it bring money and pride back to two important cities and organizations, it will create positive PR for two franchises whose only press remains a “what did they do this time?” nightmare. Besides, every baseball fan knows there are three cardinal sins to the sport: Interleague play. The Red Sox winning a world series. And the Dodgers leaving Brooklyn.

You can right one of those wrongs Mr. Selig. I'm available for consulting.

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